The Kismetic Strategist

HT: motivatedphotos.com

In the Spring of 2008, I officially embarked on two journeys: the first an internship in Marketing, the second a quest to go on thirty dates in twenty weeks (and ended at 32 in 19 weeks).  From this, I realized how similar dating and marketing can be:

1. In the beginning, quantity of leads is important. Getting a number feels good, it is self affirming, and it keeps you busy.  Getting twenty numbers feels even better.
2. With a sufficient quantity of leads, lead scoring is critical. While getting a lot of leads feels great, eventually you will  have more than you can handle; at this point, you need to find a way to prioritize leads.  Rating date prospects on a scale of 1 to 10 is obvious, but this score is based on the desirability of the lead, not the chances of success; a better approach sets minimum qualifications while considering the likelihood of success.
3. Learn from your mistakes. Within the first few weeks, I began to keep a spreadsheet to track variables (location, source, etc.)  From this, I became aware of causes of failure, and considered alternatives to test.
4. Social validation is critical. Of all of the variables present, the greatest predictor of dating success was whether or not a lead was referred by a mutual acquaintance; in fact, the odds of success tripled given this source.  The people we associate with will have more impact on our successes than anything else we do.  Choose your friends  wisely.
5. Success breeds success (and it often comes after a Dip).  When I first started, I met with a lot of failure ( I am a classically awkward closer.)  Looking back, it is easy to see where I took off: after a particularly bad week of five awful dates, I stood at 15, and I decided I needed to stop; it was no longer fun, and I felt no better off than I had been before.  But then, I found a great prospect, and 15 lessons in failure become the pillars of success.
6. Confidence is key. Most people are deficient in self confidence, so sharing yours can be mutually valuable.  For a long time, I refused to offer confidence to others; when a woman would ask me the typical question “Do I look fat in this dress” I would tell her my true opinion and she knew that.  I only recently realized that confidence, like love, is a gift that is more valuable when shared.  Few people want your true opinion: most want, more than anything else, a loan of confidence to help them execute on their plan, no matter how ill fated.

Dear Readers: Have you found any other similarities between dating and marketing?